Could this be it - 5 (part iii)?
You couldn't make this up:-
'The letters dropped on to the mat with that all to familiar thud. Excitedly he opened up the letter marked 'Urgent'. He read the large red letters with dismay: '...We are going to break into your house, with Police presence and cut you off. We have charged you £10. We will charge you £230 to fit a pre-pay meter. We will charge you £30 for the visit'...'
Oh good(!). So the 40 minute calls to Miss a, b and bloody c did a lot of good then. I called Saturn again and spoke to Miss AlphaCenturi.
"Hello, now I'm really cross. Are you lot really stupid or do you get trained in it? If you break into my house I'll sue you for criminal damage."
To be fair, she kept very calm. I guess she's done this before.
"Don't worry, we're changing to a new system, it hasn't caught up yet"
"So when my double-glazed front door is lying on the mat in a thousand pieces it'll be 'ok' because 'the system' hasn't 'caught up' yet?"
She never even drew breath.
"Really don't worry, there's loads of notes on the account here. We don't do anything without reading the notes."
"Oh, so you can read then? Because you certainly don't f***ing listen"
(click)
'The letters dropped on to the mat with that all to familiar thud. Excitedly he opened up the letter marked 'Urgent'. He read the large red letters with dismay: '...We are going to break into your house, with Police presence and cut you off. We have charged you £10. We will charge you £230 to fit a pre-pay meter. We will charge you £30 for the visit'...'
Oh good(!). So the 40 minute calls to Miss a, b and bloody c did a lot of good then. I called Saturn again and spoke to Miss AlphaCenturi.
"Hello, now I'm really cross. Are you lot really stupid or do you get trained in it? If you break into my house I'll sue you for criminal damage."
To be fair, she kept very calm. I guess she's done this before.
"Don't worry, we're changing to a new system, it hasn't caught up yet"
"So when my double-glazed front door is lying on the mat in a thousand pieces it'll be 'ok' because 'the system' hasn't 'caught up' yet?"
She never even drew breath.
"Really don't worry, there's loads of notes on the account here. We don't do anything without reading the notes."
"Oh, so you can read then? Because you certainly don't f***ing listen"
(click)
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