Oh Lord, won’t you buy me a Mercedes Benz?

I was late this morning for various reasons, so I abandoned the roadie in the street just before rushing in to get changed to go to work. I got out of the car and with a small deft tap of my knee knocked the car keys from my hand:-
  • One smart Roadster (Brabus 101) - £8,300
  • Fuel for one fast dash in from Herne Bay - £2.50
  • One crowbar - £4.50
  • Dropping your car keys down the drain when you're in a hurry - priceless.
Here's the picture: me lying prone in the road, with no shirt on, ear pressed to the tarmac, hand down a storm drain full of very dead leaves rummaging around 18" of stagnant water. It took me about 15 minutes to get the damn drain cover off as it was cemented in with 25 years worth of dirt and gravel. Fortunately, the dead leaves supported the weight of the keys and they hadn't sunk to the bottom - still not sure how deep the water actually was.

I was trying to imagine the conversation with the insurance people when trying to get them replaced as I was convinced that the radio alarm was now soaking wet and useless.

I opened the key fob cover and was amazed that the 20 minutes spent underwater had left the inside completely dry.

Bodywork by Swatch, key fob engineering by Mercedes-Benz.

Oh Lord, won’t you buy me a Mercedes Benz?
My friends all drive Porsches, I must make amends,
Worked hard all my lifetime, no help from my friends,
So oh Lord, won’t you buy me a Mercedes Benz?
JANIS JOPLIN

...still got in for 9 though!
Oh, and here's a good tip - don't keep your house keys on the same ring as your car keys.

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