Merry Christmas and all that

Consider this. It's Christmas Eve and the family are round - like good Catholics we they are, they all go to Midnight Mass. So that no one can break in and steal the presents, I volunteer to stay at home guarding the Christmas Tree - armed only with a decent bottle of Chatneau-Neuf.

2am arrives and we trot off to the Land Of Nod. The good wife and I sleep downstairs with the trusty mobile phone alarm set for 10am so that the sprouts can go on ready for 3pm lunch.

At precisely 07:15 the phone erupts with some weird polyphonic garbage that laughingly passes for a text message alert.

"What the f*** was that?"
"It's my best friend Lorraine1 wishing us a Happy Christmas! How nice!"

I think she's the second person to be nominated for the pwsbk award...

1Name not changed - at all.

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