The old boiler goes...

No, not "'er indoors", but the Galaxy Gloworm installed when the house was new 26 years ago. Although it's working just fine, none of the others on the estate are, so we decided a preemptive strike and to sneak up on it unawares whilst we had the chance.

We had British Gas in.
"No problem sir, we'll just stuff it in the airing cupboard where the tank is and you can have five pipes running up the hall which you can box in later."
"What about the flue?", I enquired, "we have a loft extension and you can't run it through there."
"Yes we can, you'll have to move your bed and wardrobe and you can box in the flue afterwards. By the way, it's £5,300".

We had an independent plumber in.
"Nope, can't do a good enough job. Bye."

We called in another.
"Err, how about if we move it to the small loft space you have left where the (now) redundant tanks are? I'll have to pull up the floorboards to run the new pipes."
"Err, brilliant? How much"
"£3,600"
"You've got the job."
He bottled it later and claimed "something came up".

On recommendation from a friend we called in Laurel & Hardy (actually Gary & Colin). Now the reason I said this was that from the moment they turned up it was like a double-act. Full of humour and good natured banter. They took one look. "Nope, can't put it in the airing cupboard, can't get the flue out or the condensate. We can get it in the loft space and we can use the existing pipework that feeds the old tanks so we won't need to rip anything up. We'll use a Worcester-Bosch too, not the dodgy easy-to-fit Alpha 35's that everyone else uses."
"You've got the job"

They start Tuesday. We started Saturday. Now our loft/airing cupboard and under-stairs cupboard are empty and the lounge isn't...

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