Be afraid, be very afraid.

We spent an interesting time near Naples the other week. Interesting, not because the weather was nice and it was all relaxing, or the fact that we spent the week in a down-market version of Center-Parcs, no, it's because the Italians are completely and utterly mad on the road. "What" I hear you say "we already knew that".

Wrong - these guys make a profession of it.

I've driven along the Adriatic Coast, I've driven in Rome and I've driven in Sicily. But the drivers around Naples are totally bonkers. First of all, the roads are only wide enough for two Fiat 500's and secondly most of them are hacked into a cliff face with a vertical face one side and a sheer drop the other, secured only by a small brick wall.

This is a picture of such a road taken shamelessly from this site:


Now what makes it interesting is the following scenario:

You're driving along at 20 mph trying to slot the i30 between the cliff face + pedestrians and the white line when a lorry comes around the bend straddling the white line because he's already too wide for the road. You're vaguely aware that there's a moped behind you. The lorry approaches and when he's about 20 feet away you hear a "beep" and the moped starts to overtake you and aims directly at the lorry. No one gives way. Eventually the moped starts to dive right, cutting across your front, missing the lorry by about 3 feet.

This leaves a small 3 foot gap between the moped and the lorry.

The larger motor bike, who has snuck up behind you whilst all this is going on, now guns it and slots it through the gap between the moped and the lorry. You instinctively edge right a little and clip all the elbows of the pedestrians with the nearside wing mirror.

Everyone carries on as though this is normal.

Substitute moped, lorry, motorbike, pedestrian with any other road user in any combination on any road at any time and you've got it.

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