50+ and proud of it.

I was Googling for stuff about Private Parking Companies (PPC) the other day, for reasons which may, or may not, become clear later. Through an intricate series of "following-web-links" I came across this gem . It's very long. But it comes with a health warning. Don't drink coffee when reading. Enjoy.

My wife has recently been into "day hospital" for a minor operation. It was the usual "name, date of birth, next of kin please" sort of stuff and eventually we made it onto the ward where we went through *exactly* the same set of questions. "They're only making sure they've got the right person," my said trying to justify, "they must make sure that everything is right!" "Right, everything off, put on that gown" smiled the cheery nurse, "now go and pee into that bowl..." "Oh, ok(?)" replied the wife, "I'm sure they know what they're doing." She toddled off and returned with a bowl full of, well, you know. "Ah" "Ah, what?" said the wife "I didn't notice that on your notes, it says you had 'the lot' out a while ago, the pee-test was to ensure that you're not pregnant." "Err, yes, I am completely potential-child free and have been for some time ...

You would think that plugging in a plug is one of the more easy things to do in the 21st century wouldn't you? Well. Last night my "Homeplug v2.0" turned up so that I could connect my TV to the Internet so that I could watch stuff on iPlayer - like the last episode of the series of Doctor Who . The small piece of paper labelled "How to add another Homeplug to an existing network" gave five steps: Plug in the plug. Press and hold the security button 10 seconds Wait until the green light stops flashing. Press the same button on number 1 for 3 seconds. Press the same button on number 2 for 3 seconds. " Wait one minute and you are now networked! " What really happened:- I can do that by reaching behind the TV and plugging it into the power strip. The lights come on and then off again. I can do this too by stretching over the TV, catching my ribs on the top of the TV and winding myself. The lights stop flashing and then they all go off. Number 1? Ah, this o...

I was going to simply put " very " and leave it at that. However... The story so far: Sunday: Go to Mom's for her 96th birthday. (Birthday on the Saturday, but we wanted to take the Great-Grandson with us and his Mom & Dad were only free then). Get there for 15:40 (well, we had got the grandson and they were late getting to us, then we had to feed him half way up the M1. As someone said once "I feel like I've had a good day if I can get the baby and me dressed by lunchtime). Pull up on Mom's driveway to get accosted by a deputation from the neighbours - "She's driving us nuts ringing up every half hour sort out the TV!". Apparently they sort it out and she then fiddles with it because "the picture is dreadful" and then calls them over again. It turns out that "they" turned off the analogue signal a few weeks ago and Mom was trying to watch white noise. The FreeSat box we had fitted a while back simply wasn't being use...